Starting Your Family

A marriage isn’t just about two people. Children or stepchildren may also play a positive or a negative role now or later in the marriage.

Raising children is more than just doing tedious daily chores, such as feeding and changing diapers. Even those daily chores shouldn’t be avoided or ignored because they’re the backgrounds for establishing the relationships with the children, as well as developing the personalities of the children.

Personality and growth

Every child has his or her own personality, which is just a reflection of the parent, but is not the personality of the parent. So, be only a role model: always showing your love and your care.

Spend more time with your children with many open-ended questions to develop their own thinking mind.

Try not to punish them for any misbehavior by denying or removing any privilege they think they’re rightly entitled to. Instead, demand an apology, either a spoken or a written one. Also, explain to them the truth that no one is perfect.

Praise them for their good deeds, but with no empty promises that will not be fulfilled.

Passion and creativity

Every child has his or her likes and dislikes that may ultimately become his or her own passion and creativity.

Passion is the intense desire of the child to do what he or she likes to do, based on the child’s inherent gifts and skills.

Creativity is the self-expression of a child to cope with his or her own inner feelings. It‘s also a mental growth giving the child the opportunity to try out new ideas, as well as a new way of thinking and solving problems.

Avoid being “over-parenting,” which is imposing on your children your own likes and dislikes.

Pay attention to your children’s daily interests and material activities. Create space for them to engage in them.

Observe their activities and show them how to solve the problems arising. It’s important to teach them “never give up.”

Invent different scenarios for their current activities with different questions for them.

Give them arts and crafts to develop and pursue their creativity.

Let them spend more time in nature, which can inspire them with new ideas.

Create time for your own creativity, such as playing your music, doing some of your own artwork, working on the computer to write poetry or a book. Let your children also see and learn from you as a role model.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

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