Money matters
We all need money to survive. As a result, in many marriages, many people fight over money matters. The problem is that people have different perspectives of money-worth. For example, you may think spending $100 on a pair of jeans is worth it, but your spouse may think otherwise. To determine the real worth of anything is subjective and difficult, and therefore should be based on the man-hours spent: that is, if you think you are willing and be prepared to work those hours for that pair of jeans, then it is worth it, at least to you.
All your behaviors are your choice, and hence you are responsible for the consequences—not somebody else, not even your spouse. Understanding the principle of choice may avoid unnecessary fights over money matters
Nearly half of all divorces in the United States
Remember the saying of John Woodbridge Patten about money: “buys everything but happiness, and takes a man everywhere but heaven.”
Money is symbolic of so many things in life—effort, self-worth, and status, among other things. Money also symbolizes the unity and oneness of a married couple. If there is no harmony in money matters, it would be difficult to have balance and harmony in other things that constitute a good and healthy marriage.
The relationship with money
Identifying the real relationship with money, with neither self-criticism nor self-justification.
If you want to get rich (it is your choice), remember these:
The essentials of food, clothing, and shelter are all you need to be content and thankful.
The love of money often destroys a man’s life and his soul.
If you want to stay rich, remember these:
The ultimate ownership belongs to God, who owns all things.
Do good and be rich in your deeds and generosity. Help those who are less fortunate than yourself.
Understanding money problems
Understanding money problems is more than half way through solving the problems of money.
The principle of spending is simple: Never buy what you don’t need with the money you don’t have.
Buy what you need, not what you want.
Create a budget to avoid conflicts:
Determine the total net income after taxes.
Decide your basic expenses (rent/mortgage, foods, bills etc.)
Total income less expenses is the monthly spending money. Divide it into two.
Spend however you want to spend it.
Do not let money become a stress factor in life: money can age you more than anything else.
Do not let money become a bone of contention in your marriage: many money fights are in fact continuing fights between partners over control and power, but thinly disguised in money matters; they are only “fake” money fights.
Problems in a marriage often occur as a result of these behaviors related to money:
Playing the blame game
Complaining and criticizing too much
Nagging and threatening to get what one wants
Divorce
A marriage is made to last. So do everything within your power to make it last.
If your marriage is on the rocks, save your marriage and stop your divorce!
Julia Smarty
Copyright© by Julia Smarty
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